Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make.
Then they call me ugly and poor
We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.
“This isn’t the first time my husband’s cheated on me, but you’re my sister! You’d better have a better explanation than this magic lamp.”
“You know how you have to be specific making wishes? Well, I was really horny and asked the genie to have the world’s biggest penis…ended up with a concert pianist that’s seven foot tall. Nice guy. Next time I tried, I asked for the world’s biggest cock, that was fun but the poor rooster died. So I asked for the world’s biggest dick and that’s how I ended up on top of your husband.”
So I went to my friends funeral today, As we were all leaving a kid put a get well soon card next to my friends grave ‘poor kid’
Donald Trump is making hospitals so poor that they are using kidney beans for their transplants
Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone.
But when she bent over, Rover took over, and gave her a bone of his own
If I was in a room with Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, Hitler, and my greatest enemy I would poor out the bullets and beat my enemy with the gun.
Yo mama so poor she can’t even pay attention.
What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire (A tire as in clothes and the tire? U get it? no? I’m lonely. add me on Xbox: DECIMUS PAX)
One afternoon, a man was walking to a bar after work. Across the street, an Irish nun stood there waving her arms at the man. “Look at this poor drunkard! The Lord does not love him! He will be sent to Hell!” the nun shouted. The man walked over to the nun. “Hey! I had a hard day at work! I was going to get ONE beer! Have you ever even tried a drink before?” the man asked. The nun looked down and shook her head. “Well, if you tried it, you would probably like it! Would you want to try something?” the man asked. The nun replied, “Okay, only one thing.” “What would you like?” asked the man. He offered her beer and whiskey, but she declined. “How about a little gin?” the man concluded. “Okay, sure. But, can you ask them to put it in a mug so people don’t see what I’m drinking?” asked the nun. “Fine,” the man walks into the bar and waves to the bartender. “Hey, can I have a bottle of beer and a bit of gin? Also, can that be in a mug?” asked the man. The bartender looked up, with fury in his eyes. “Don’t tell me that damn nun is out there again!” the bartender said.
My grandfather died at atshuitz Poor fella fell of the guard tower
Yo mama so poor she chased a garbage truck with a shopping list
Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.
Poor bastard.
Flag of Congo — Kinshasa @osowxvyy I was in Portugal enjoying my lunch when I saw a man choking! i wanted to save him but a local stopped me. “that’s Penandes, he always chokes when it matters most and ghosts in big games.” True enough, Penandes’ Ghost emerged from his body! Poor Penandes, may he get well soon!
ME: when I saw an orphan on the street in rags also me: are u okay orphan: yeah what gave it way ME: because you have no family
How do you get a deppressed girl to suck your dick
Poor bleach on it
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