How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at you front door? Matt
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
So there’s a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says “Step on a crack and you break your mother’s back,”. The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother’s back breaking. The little girl’s father looks in terror, she then says “step on a line and you break your father’s spine,”. The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out “OW MY SPINE, ”. The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”
Wanna hear somethin’ ironic? When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can’t stop cutting.
I saw a kid crying and i asked him where his parents were… Man i love working at a Orphanige
I saw my friend hang themselves my response was i guess they wanted to hang with someone
What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.
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