Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu
life’s too short to want it.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He yelled, "Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, “I know, I amputated your arms.”
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
why do emos like circles because they can hang out with them
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”
Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck
One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in Because the people came back for their dog
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me let go of my nose
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