Nut jokes

What did the nut chasing the other nut say? Imma cashew

Why did the squirrel swim on his back? keep his nuts dry.

A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, “I’ll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me

What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.

Anybody know a girl named Candice? she just added me on snap

Would you rather date me or I lady I laid deez nuts in your mouth

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are 49 cents but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer you won’t understand it.)

I’m so excited for Christmas Pudding… Pudding these nuts in your mouth

DEEEZ NUTS

A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship’s wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, “What’s with the wheel in your pants?” The pirate replies, “Yarrr! It’s drivin’ me nuts!”

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel? ” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts!”

What do u call a 3 sum with a girl with aids?

Nut in the butt

%%A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel hanging down his pants. A guy walks buy and says ""Pardon me sir, but you’ve got a wheel hanging down your pants. The pirate responds ‘‘I know. i’ts driving me nuts!’’

If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?

I have a pun, but I will nut-tella you!