What’s the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman? Batman returns
whats the difference between a blonde and a car door: the harder you slam the blonde the looser it gets
What’s the difference between a bird and a human? “We don’t eat with our peckers
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date
My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day: Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you’re told. What’s the difference between your girlfriend and sister ? Nothing if your from Alabama
What’s the difference between my dad and a hooker? Hookers come back.
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off
Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.
what is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon
What’s the difference between Issac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death? Issac Newton dies a virgin.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying ten babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be saying one baby in ten trashcans
what’s the difference between a feminist and suicide vest a least one does something when it is triggered
What’s the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they’re both too short.
A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says “Okay I’d like you to point to wherever it hurts”. So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says “Here. Ow.” She then pokes her arm and says “Here. Ow.” She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say “I know what’s happened to you.” “What’s happened to me??” The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, “You have a broken finger.”
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