So a Irish man is walking his poodle and his buddy comes running up to him saying there’s a new pub in town and they’re giving out free pints. So the man picks up his dog and runs like hell to the bar. But the bar owner stops him and says sorry you can’t go in. The Irish man says why can’t I go in? Well you have a dog sir and that sign over there says no dogs aloud your going to have to leave him outside. Well the Irish man thinks quick and says. I’m blind it’s a seeing eye dog. The owner says that’s ridiculous a seeing eye dog would be a German shepherd or golden Labrador or something like that. The Irish man says well what kind of dog did they give me???
Hell you f@ck bitch dick
I told her roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what the hell happened to you!! MF???
Why the "hell:) " is this here
How do angels?? make holy water???
They boil the hell out of it.
[god creating sharks] god: ok give them 3 rows of teeth. Angel: seems excessive but ok. God: and make them mean as hell. Angel: wtf y. God: BECAUSSE I SAID SO. Angel:… god: and make one of the types have a hammer for a head angel: why do I still work for you? God: because I’m the only employer as of right now.
(A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing)
Man: Ah… suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump? Lady: Yep. I hate this world. Man: Well, if your gonna die, can we have sex before you jump? Lady: Hell no! You creep! Man: Ok, fine. I guess I’ll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore…
I have a friend who dont have a dad he says: ur useless go to hell me: wait why do u want me to join ur dad
Addison Banks Age (8) "I’m a little brat who won’t shut up the hell! And stop talking!
3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: “Local calls are free”.
Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust ring in hell-
Aw hell naw
Dey turned spongilebile in2 a frigin generator.
When a 68 year old teacher says: I am going to tackle an intruder if i have to!
Me: Oh hell nah
What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them
If you don’t like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON’T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at and if they cry, just say ‘hey here are your parents’ then grab nothing. perfect example.
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