What happened to the blind man’s son. He thought he was hitting a pinyata.
A Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff. But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share ?’ ""Yes madam…My daddy told me a story about my Mom " “OK, let’s hear” said the teacher. “My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit”. “She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife”. “She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.” Pin drop silence in the class !! ""Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher “What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story ? ” “Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk```…!!!”
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first? The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
When your mom tries to hit you with the belt but misses and hits herself… #victoryroyale
any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery
Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14
Who reads the fastest? The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers, He took out 83 stories in one go.
What do you do when your dish washer stops working Hit your wife harder
Why did i walk across the road? to get hit by a car
Knott and Shott got into a gunfight. Knott was shot and Shott was not. Therefore it was better to be Shott than Knott. But what if the shot Shott shot didn’t hit Knott but Shott? Then the shot Shott shot shot Shott.
friend: hits head* others: how many fingers am i holding up? me: to friend* how suicidal am i on a scale from one to ten? friend: ten me: hes fine guys
Student: a plane is carrying 204 bricks, one falls out, how many are left? Teacher: 203 Student: how do you put an elephant in the fridge? Teacher: You can’t Student: yes you can, open fridge door put elephant in. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Teacher: open door put in giraffe? Student: no, take out elephant put in giraffe. The lion king is having a party, who isn’t there? Teacher: let me guess, the lion Student: no the giraffe, he’s stuck in a fridge. Sally has to cross a river full of vicious alligators to get to safety, she gets across safely how? Teacher: she stepped on the alligators? Student: no the alligators are at the party, Sally dies anyway, how? Teacher: she frowned? Student: no, she was hit in the head by a falling brick.
Why did Joey drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck. (Don’t worry, the truck was fine.)
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last big hit was the wall.
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 14.
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